ABOUT LINDA,

INT. BEAUTY SALON-WAXING SUITE.

Linda is getting her legs waxed by middle-aged Russian woman, Hilda, who looks like she's spent time in the Russian front, only she's been colorized.Linda has her blouse on and just underwear. She is working on the front of Linda's calves. Hilda rips a cloth with wax on it off of Linda's leg.

Ow.Shit...damn it Hilda.

Such coarse, stubby hairs.  So, I know. I know you shaved. Why you shave?

Hilda, lay off, okay...I was desperate. I had a meeting up in Big Bear and the Jacuzzi possibility was very high. You know, I'm the only woman in broadcast that has body hair and I had to be smooth!
 

You have interrupted your follicle cycle. All my work with you have been ruined.

Oh, come on Hilda---

Hey, no no no no no. I'm in a session. You cannot be here. I am sorry. Please, please please---

That's okay, She's mine.

Ah. It's okay Hilda, it's my Mom.
(to the old woman)
Ma, I told you to wait outside. We have plenty of time for breakfast. I'll only be a few moments.

Okay Sweetie, but why are your legs so red?

Because I'm having the hair ripped out of them.

Oh, well, then see if she can do anything about your arm hair.

(To Hilda)
It's really thick.

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk Tsk.  Turn over.

ABOUT AIMEE,

INT:  A HEALER'S OFFICE.

Aimee is being examined by her very serious, Svengali-like homeopathic Healer. He picks up one of her arms very carefully, then lets it drop.  He picks up her other arm, and starts beating a tiny drum around her head.

Um...

Shh.

Uh - well...

Shh.

Did you have sugar yesterday?

I - I had a fourth of a peach.

I knew it.  Your shoulders are a disaster.

Really?

And your clavicle is just teeming with nitrates.

Hey - what's this here - above  your kidney?

I...

Is it - something with Julie?

Yes!  She got fired today.

Aimee, I told you to dump Julie.  She's a toxic friend.

But I like her.

Well, tell that to your kidneys.

I - I bought that bark you told me about.

Did you make a tea with it?

Yeah, but my neighbors complained about the smell, and then I had
diarrhea for a week.

Why haven't you moved yet?  Your neighbors are aggravating all
your pent up anger, and I have to keep re-orienting your spleen.
The healer starts to adjust her spine.

I've been very busy lately, with trying to re-do the wedding and everything.

So óyou've set a new date?

Um ónot exactly.

Aimee, Aimee, Aimee.

I know, it looks like I'm stalling, but I swear I'm not. Ow!

Don't you think it's time to deal with your fear of committment and stop stringing Mark along?

I am not stringing him along, and I Ow!  I don't seem to have any feeling in my left arm right now.

That's because you're in denial. Sit up.Here.  Drink this.
He hands her a cup of red slime with white mold spots on it.

Uch.  What is it?

It's to counteract that conversation you had with your mother on Wednesday.

That's okay.  The gagging is normal. Just make sure you donít swallow your tongue.

ABOUT JULIE,

INT. OFFICE - GROUP THERAPY SESSION

And that's when I told my wife I wanted to be a woman.

John, you are so very brave. It reminds me of the time I told my ex-girlfriend about my years in prison.

Wow.

Very good Darryl. Tim, what's going on with you?

I think I'm going through some kind of regression because I'm reliving all those feelings of rejection I had when I came out to my mother.

Regressions are very healthy Tim. They are a reminder of how far we've come.

I'm just so sad that I'll never have children.

Julie, how are you doing this week?

Well I wanna buy a couch and I came up with some titles for my script.  Do you want to hear them?

Maybe later.